Would I make a good Dad ? crossed my mind more than once as well. Truthfully, I felt a bit uncertain in this area. Still trying to sort out my own patch in the world didn't seem the way to be if I was to be responsible for wife and child(s). Basically I passed a few tests; reliable, dependable, paying off my own unit, had a car, friends, always in full time work ( boy do I sound boring as batshit) and generally a fairly good citizen who would get the nod from Batman. I hadn't risen to any dizzy heights in careers but I wasn't unemployed either. So pretty average really.
Most guys are in the same boat I reckon, well, me anyway. And apart from being the average citizen above, a lot of that description can fly out the window once a baby arrives. If you thought you had cool, think again.
But seeing myself as a dad, a father, a leader? and provider, husband and protector of my family no matter what, a good example for my kids from which to learn? Well, when I thought of that in context of kids, really, my confidence was a little shaky. Just what sort of model person was I to think I could help mold the greatness within my kid(s) to be? In truth, struth, just pretty average really; plenty of uncertainties within my own life, my own personality; without taking on the responsibility for someone else's life. Who do I think I am?
(Whatever happened to golf, squash, working out at the gym, hikes into the unknown?-That was part of me. Oh well, next year.)
I don't praise them enough, my patience seems less and I have to work hard to be a model dad. I'll keep plodding along though, because despite my failures there are successes. I'm pretty sure the kids (deep down) think I'm okay. I make sure I tell my kids that I love them, no matter what.
From my kids point of view, I guess they just want a dad there. They would rather have me as a good dad than being world famous and rich (yeh, right. Did I really just say that?); Would they take more notice of me if hearing the notes rustle in the wallet? Sadly for them, they'll never know.
Resume of the perfect father: funny, serious, handsome (easy for me), powerful, wise, patient, kind, generous, sensitive yet masculine as hell, 'triffic husband and lover worth a mention I guess, firm but fair in discipline (although as a perfect father discipline wouldn't be necessary), dependable, successful, popular with all and an all-round great guy. Also has to be good at sport, music, theatre, mechanics, house building and possess the ability to make your kids feel good about themselves when they really screw up; Wait. This sounds like the Brady Bunch menu. This short list of tips were imbedded in my very young Aussie brain growing up with shows such as Father Knows Best and Leave It To Beaver (American shows for those that haven't heard of them).
In case anyone is wondering, I don't possess these qualifications (except the handsome and powerful bits). I'm still working on patience.
Another quality or spec. often mentioned is being a friend to your kids. That's one item I'm not really worried about. As much as I'd like to be their friend, they need me as a Dad. There is a difference. Dads have to do things that friends don't, like discipline.
When they are older they'll start to think of me as a person, not someone born as a grown-up with now greying hair and stopping them from having a great life that only they could know about. So, in the meantime, I'll continue to work on being a person who tries to be a good dad; whatever that means. By being a good Dad maybe the kids will later realise what a good friend I tried to be.